feels like starting over – furrowing my brow to remember my username and password for this blog. simultaneously embarrassed and relieved to be writing on here again, after a few months of……silence. yes, we’ve had a lot going on. yes, our two pets died in september. yes, we moved (just up the road ;)). yes, brett was out of town weekly from september through november. yes, having four school-age children means that there is much to be done on a daily basis. and, YES! i am happy to be writing, right now.
what to write about after a hiatus such as this? easy. i am deeply in love with my seven year old daughter.
as a parent, there is some moral code that says we must preface a conversation about the virtues of one of our children, by saying: of course, i love all my children deeply and completely. now that that requirement is taken care of (and truth!)……i am smitten by sophia.
her loveliness and kindness seems to come from something or somewhere that is untarnished and pure. it is how she makes me feel when i am in her presence; like i am sitting at the feet of my guru.
it is her eyes, which are warm and deep. i gaze into her eyes, and i don’t want to stop, ever. it’s like, when you have a newborn baby in your arms and it is difficult to look anywhere else; and you can spend hours or days simply looking at your baby. well, for me, that feeling never went away. i see sophia and my gaze is fixed.
it is her hands. they are small, graceful, elegant and capable. i love to watch her hands as she pets the dog, writes the story, builds the legos, and plants the flowers. but mostly, i love when we sit close, and she puts one of those lovely hands on my knee or thigh and i feel its delicate weight and the warmth of its presence.
it is her voice. she is blessed with the sweetest voice i have ever heard. when i speak to her on the phone, i find myself struggling to pay attention to what she is saying because i become so distracted by the soothing, soft, lyrical quality of her voice; and i can’t help but grin from ear to ear.
she has depth and goodness to her, as i believe, all young children do. it is because of this that i recommit myself every single day to live a noble life and to continue to create and re-create a world, a society, that values the beauty and innocence of children. for they are some of our greatest teachers and gifts.
namaste! i hope to write on here again, real soon 🙂